JudicatorAndarin
Starcraft.org User
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The following are documents submitted by this user:
| # | Document | Channel |
| 1 | Starcraft II | Fan Art |
| 2 | Tips for Improving Terran Performance | Strategies |
| 3 | Marine or Goliath? A Hard Choice | Strategies |
| 4 | The Art of War: Basic Protocols | Strategies |
| 5 | On Expanding and Nuking | Strategies |
| 6 | The Most Confusing War Ever | Strategies |
| 7 | A Tale of Two Towers, Act 1 | Fiction |
| 8 | Forum: Awards June 06 | Fiction |
| 9 | Forum: Quibbles June 06 | Fiction |
| 10 | MEDAL of HONOR Chapter 1: Audacity | Fiction |
| 11 | MEDAL of HONOR Chapter 2: Patience | Fiction |
| 12 | MEDAL of HONOR Chapter 3: Wisdom | Fiction |
| 13 | MEDAL of HONOR Chapter 4: Dishonor | Fiction |
| 14 | MEDAL of HONOR Installment 6: More Description Ple | Fiction |
| 15 | MEDAL of HONOR Installment 7: The False Game | Fiction |
| 16 | MEDAL of HONOR Installment 8: The False Symbol | Fiction |
| 17 | MEDAL of HONOR Prologue: Initiative | Fiction |
| 18 | Starcraft Questions Answered | Fiction |
| 19 | The Test | Fiction |
| 20 | The Unidentified Space Entity | Fiction |
| 21 | Viva' Tanoth | Fiction |
| 22 | Writing School Day 1: Deux ex Machina | Fiction |
| 23 | Writing School Day 2: By Fire and Pen | Fiction |
The following are comments posted by this user:
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#1. Posted on August 27, 2006 10:58 AM. (OT: Excellent work FFzprivate, you sure did your homework on PFR 7, getting all the terms and ideas correct along the way. Everyone keep up the good work!) 
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Dutch was in his light patients' gown, laying on the mobile bed as he was rolled headfirst into a giant cylindrical structure. the MRI. For an annual checkup, his PET scan from yesterday had been extremely abnormal; there were high levels of radioisotope concentration in the wrong places, and seemingly through ...Click here to view this comment. |
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#2. Posted on August 23, 2006 02:03 PM. 1. This is a poll poll. That said, it's a poll all right, but then StarCraft polls should not be ordinary ones. 2. I like PFR. If you like it, why don't you check it out? I mean the current one, PFR7. There's life again, for those of you who got disappointed too easily and didn't think to fix the situation on your own until I got back two weeks later (which was okay for the timeline). Contribute! We want to see others' writing on PFR again
3. I'm on the Map Review Board. Who's with me? ...Click here to view this comment. |
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#3. Posted on August 23, 2006 01:27 PM. ---------------------- Commentary on how the first Overmind had been destroyed, by the Judicator Andarin. <<<<<One must wonder how the miniscule Protoss force still capable of operation to any extent on the surface of Aiur could have caused an action that sent repercussions throughout the known universe, an action that changed the fate of all three embroiled races. Specifically: How could they have slain the Overmind? This answer entails a very long story, but we shall not go ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#4. Posted on August 23, 2006 12:56 PM. Good. The only thing is that it looks too geometric. All of the wraiths are tilted the same and face exactly the same direction. "I thought I wrought; I learned; I discerned." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#5. Posted on August 22, 2006 02:08 PM. Of course it's still going. Here's more: Viva'Tanoth was the jackpot indeed. Within twenty four minutes, the usually incompetent Dominion Terran Headquarters had given out its orders, and thousands of Terrans landed on this sacred ground, bringing the wounded and the dead to be healed or ressurected. Treasure indeed! And ye- From the farthest reaches of the Terran colonies, even from the mother planet Earth, the people who had been on the verge of death, or had been handicapped in the mids ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#6. Posted on August 11, 2006 02:20 PM. This strategy can take A LOT of work. Here's a list of some ways to improve. 0. I'm at least considering this as worthwhile. That's why I'm writing all this. Hopefully you will pick up on some of this. 1. You must realize that Starcraft is not so simple. It may be this simple back in Warcraft 1 and 2. 2. Enemies will have many different strategies. Try completing the single player ALL THE WAY THROUGH and then try working on MELEE MAPS ALL THE WAY THROUGH and finally go to b.net and play un ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#7. Posted on August 04, 2006 08:51 AM. I had a similar problem on this website before. I think I know how to fix it. It's probably because your browser's settings are not fit for the website. So if you go to View under the Internet Explorer menu, then to Encoding, you can select "Auto Select" or just do it manually and sooner or later it should work out. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#8. Posted on August 04, 2006 08:48 AM. Summonning powers are good. You need that to become an Archon. Well, it seems that my own series hasn't scored quite as high as the original here. Disapointment! All right, I'll get back to my story once school resumes. No promises though, 'cuz i b busy' this coming school year. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#9. Posted on August 04, 2006 08:42 AM. Darn, that Zergling is just too powerful. How can it possibly destroy whole fleets? And enemy units can't be recalled by an arbiter, recall doesn't work while the arbiter is over a body of water, and an arbiter only has enough energy for 1 recall and 1 stasis field; not a second one. Humorous, but totally unrealistic, SC-wise. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#10. Posted on August 01, 2006 08:16 AM. I don't really know if massing a particular unit or duo works well, because players can easily counter. THis isn't a problem against the computer, because the AI isn't flexible (besides building specific defenses whereever you attack them). You won't gain much by going battlecruisers against AI, because they will keep using marines and the like (slaughter). You must go against people players, who will go ghosts. The strategy should also include getting science vessels to defensive matrix the uni ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#11. Posted on August 01, 2006 08:07 AM. This strategy outlines the basic tenet of starcraft strategy in easily readable format. It's also rather obvious and outdated news, especially for advanced strategy. Consider changing the strategy level to 'beginner', it will get better reads. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#12. Posted on August 01, 2006 08:03 AM. I would agree as well. You can definitely try spicing things up with a bit of humor. Your description is very thorough, and frankly starcraft.org has so many pieces with thorough description that it no longer stands out. Concentrate on humor, strategy, and unusual things to add to your story. If your piece is funny, it may not have the right tone though, so you have to be careful when you decide where to add jokes. Sarcasm can also work, such as when Raynor is sarcastic toward Mengsk and Zeratul ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#13. Posted on August 01, 2006 07:53 AM. No matter how critical an eye you turn toward PFR6, it was still a tremendous success. With 462 comments so far, that makes it the longest running piece I've seen, and probably the longest PFR. And with 30+ posts in a single day and the like, it is definitely one of the most interesting subjects on starcraft.org. We must learn from what made it so great, rather than say that just because it wasn't starcraft, it "sucked". We see here several points: 1) unrestrained humor. Unrestrain ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#14. Posted on August 01, 2006 06:57 AM. (OT: uh-uh. This is what I planned to do all along. I'm going to start a story-within-a-PFR themed around life and death, or at least try. My last two posts fit together rather nicely, don't you think? Besides, I'm not putting myself in court as defendant. I'm asking you all to contribute to this PFR. I set up a strong lead for it.) INSTALLMENT 3: Viva'Tanoth A small group of six Marines on a scouting expedition trod rather slowly across the smouldering ruins of this vast swath of destruct ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#15. Posted on July 31, 2006 10:44 AM. mutalisk332, vulture attacks are called 'concussive'. Tricky term I know, I don't even understand what that means. Consecutive is a no-no- it means continuous, like halo rockets. Plasma shields? I thought Protoss shields WERE plasma shields. I still don't know what the plasma shields upgrade does, I thought it provided defense for when enemies were still attacking the shielding. Another thing I figured out playing Protoss is that buildings can't get their shields regenerated by shield ba ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#16. Posted on July 31, 2006 10:38 AM. Hmm, nice. Though it looks more like Zerg carapace from the shading. Not shiny enough. When I do stuff like that I use the tip of a clean eraser to create streaks of whiteness. It blends with the rest of the artwork much better than drawing until you reach the white zone, which does not look quite as natural and also doesn't allow for good shading. But that's just a hint. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#17. Posted on July 31, 2006 10:35 AM. Cool graphics! I want to do something like that myself, but I got stuck with a broken Photoshop CD. It reminds me of this question: Why do battlecruisers cost only twice as much as wraiths? I would rather have 6 battlecruisers than 10 wraiths and 1 battlecruiser as shown in the picture. Wouldn't you? "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#18. Posted on July 31, 2006 08:41 AM. Well, I've been wondering now difficult it would be to write a strat, as I'm not getting very good reviews. This one is definitely good writing, it gives others the feeling that you're smart and that they are also smart by letting them figure out some of your terminology and ideas. You also paid careful attention to details, yet told the readers (us) that we should be able to predict what is coming. Of course this was the strategy I was going to use all along, but the main problem I ran into ear ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#19. Posted on July 31, 2006 08:25 AM. Thanks for your advice, NoviceZergian, though I of course do not agree on some of those points. Strategy in starcraft has mainly to do with evaluating units when confronted with various situations and various opponent strategies and tactics. But no one ever decides to use scv's to kill mass marines, nor use marines to kill mass battlecruisers. Why? Each game is different, and although I cannot provide you with a detailed outline of what to do in each given circumstance, there are still basic ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#20. Posted on July 31, 2006 08:07 AM. Hey lyye, thanks for apologizing when you saw that you made a mistake. It prevented a flame war from popping up, so I basically give you the victory of said flame war. Hopefully you will learn from this experience and make sure that you have got the terms down pat before you begin arguing with others. Hey, oogle you norom, stop calling others "morons" (note I DIDN'T call you that, I spelled it backwards). We all know that your argument is correct. We Do have a problem with the way ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#21. Posted on July 31, 2006 07:45 AM. The Executor looked in horror as the Medal of Honor, the giant circular golden space platform, his gem, turned into a bloody battlefield. Only a moment ago he had thought that all the Zerg and Terran on Tanoth had been exterminated. That WOULD have been good. And as he scanned for signs of life on the surface, he had found nothing, for the last 18 comments straight. He thought he had won. How wrong he was. Opening his three mutually opposable thumbs out and swirling them, he generated an i ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#22. Posted on July 31, 2006 07:14 AM. My idea is to tie this in with Starcraft, but only on a tangent. I haven't settled on what exactly the connection will be, and it will probably be just in the similarity between some of the units involved. However, the theme and the mood are different from that of Starcraft, which is why lyye said that it doesn't seem to have much to do with Starcraft. Yet my own opinion is that it doesn't matter if the story isn't exactly set in Koprulu--if it's interesting and well written, well that's all I'm ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#23. Posted on July 27, 2006 02:13 PM. That kinda reminds me of the beastly units in Warcraft 3. Good, but it doesn't really look like an archon. Where's the white sphere? "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#24. Posted on July 27, 2006 02:12 PM. It's one of the longest comics I've seen so far. Good. The marines are adorable (did I use the wrong word? But they DO look like children!). "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#25. Posted on July 27, 2006 02:09 PM. Excellent piece of work. The environment doesn't fit it. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#26. Posted on July 27, 2006 02:08 PM. Where do you all get the starcraft-esque font from? Geez, that requires some good lego pieces. Mine aren't that varied. But interesting idea! "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#27. Posted on July 27, 2006 02:06 PM. Note that tanks don't have doors, they have hatches, about 1 foot by 1 foot. So no, it's about the size of your bedroom. I like the detail. It's quite bland thought. Need more colors. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#28. Posted on July 27, 2006 02:04 PM. The fire doesn't look right. It's too stringy. Flames should be bunched together. Don't accuse me of being a pyromaniac now... Zerg spire, you said? How? It looks like a terran structure with a rotunda. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#29. Posted on July 27, 2006 02:01 PM. The marine is awkward. And so are the carriers and the nebulae. I'm going to be picky on you, since I've seen some great artwork coming from you... "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#30. Posted on July 27, 2006 01:59 PM. Hmm. I like some of the others more. Since your pieces are all sooooo good, I'm going to start raising my expectations from you. Black and white, with some grayscale, and orange? Ew. Use color next time, especially the blue/white, or yellow/brown color themes I've seen you use already. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#31. Posted on July 27, 2006 01:57 PM. OOO Pretty!!! I'd want to hire you to be my tutor. Offer? Anyway, I especially like the blue, it matches with the snow and the sky/clouds. Blue carriers is a novelty. I like the explosion of the missile coming out. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#32. Posted on July 27, 2006 01:54 PM. Wonderful. I would nominate every one of the artworks I've seen you post. I can also see that the wings program makes better graphics than the bryce program. It's definitely scanline. Just one lack: NO EXPLOSIONS???????? "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#33. Posted on July 27, 2006 01:52 PM. Wow it seems all of your pieces are just as good. It looks a lot like the terran defeat scene in starcraft. Good. What's the matter with the hydralisk belly? The marine seems to have a split brain. Are the turrets coming off the marine? "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#34. Posted on July 27, 2006 01:51 PM. How do I get these programs? They're just what I would like to have. Hmm... Does it use scanline or raytrace? Aside from the fact that I don't know how to do either, I would really like to get to work on something like this. Definitely better graphics than what Blizzard had ten years ago. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#35. Posted on July 27, 2006 01:49 PM. I would put 'awesome' in <font=> but that wouldn't work for comments. OK, as soon as the elite section gets running again, I nominate this one. Hope the others are just as good. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#36. Posted on July 27, 2006 01:46 PM. Don't use charcoal, conte crayon, whatever it was you used for this piece on similar projects. They are too blurry and you see that you'll have difficulty fixing things and hiding your fixes. I suggest pencil and eraser. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#37. Posted on July 27, 2006 01:44 PM. For some reason, this matches extremely close to what my minds eye says the Zerg units should look like. Whether that's because I've seen the images before (in which case this is a pb) or that's because they are just TOO GOOD and you are a very qualified designer/artist(in which case this would be truely exceptional), I can't say. Bottom Line: Appreciate your posting this. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#38. Posted on July 27, 2006 01:39 PM. OK TIME OUT ZEROXP. It's almost unanimously agreed that this submission was a half-minute piece of work (with Photoshop) and therefore should not have been so readily submitted. However, Sc.org is a cooperative site. Let's have it stay that way. We don't need to be mean to each other. As for you, fenix888, this type of artwork is unacceptable. I would agree with Zero that it was a rip off. The original art was copyrighted to Blizzard Entertainment and produced with care by a host ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#39. Posted on July 27, 2006 01:29 PM. Wow, the graphics are obviously adopted from Starcraft, but you gave it a spin with the distance effect. How'd you do it? Reminds me of screenshots from Starcraft  roject Revolutions.
"I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought."
-------An Darin, Might of the Mind ...Click here to view this comment. |
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#40. Posted on July 27, 2006 01:27 PM. Sketches are not meant to be This fast, though. Put some more time into your work, and take a look at what Protoss Carriers really look like-view the sc end-of-game scenario when the Ganthrithor crashes. If there's something in the bottom left corner, we can't see it very well. Um... I guess you're using a camera for this one and not a scanner. Try scanning. Or otherwise, try moving the camera so the light flash isn't at the center. That way it will look like a 'sun' flare or something. ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#41. Posted on July 27, 2006 01:23 PM. Meh, not much better than my Starcraft logo, but it still seems to get a better reception. Don't know why. OKOK, I'll stop making annoyingly negative comments to your posts. Don't shoot!!! "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#42. Posted on July 27, 2006 01:22 PM. I agree with Pharazon. Not particularly artful. Where's Geckat? Does he actually allow such stuff? Send this to each other via email or blog, but don't jam up sc.org with personal stuff. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#43. Posted on July 27, 2006 01:20 PM. This doesn't really look like a Zealot. You Really need to work on the head shape. Take a look at the starcraft game race-choosing screen (with the Marine, Hydralisk and Zealot) to get a better idea. It looks like a drone come out of Star Wars. Sorry to be criticizing so much. It's just that I'm an artist. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#44. Posted on July 27, 2006 01:18 PM. It just looks a bit too messy. You're definitely appealing to the old members, aren't you. I haven't seen most of them that often. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#45. Posted on July 27, 2006 01:15 PM. OK, this certainly doesn't deserve to be here. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#46. Posted on July 27, 2006 01:15 PM. Hmm.... With its huge claw things, it looks like an Overlord and Lurker hybrid. Especially since all its appendages are hanging downward. If you've seen the Overlords in the cinematic, you might remember that their tentacles are actually plump and muscular. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#47. Posted on July 27, 2006 01:11 PM. I liked it! Keep up the good work. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#48. Posted on July 27, 2006 01:10 PM. I vote good. Keep up the good work, I'm so upset about there not being any more to this series as of yet. Congrats, you kept me interested today. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#49. Posted on July 27, 2006 01:07 PM. Cool graphics, as usual. What IS that graphics program, and where can I get my copy of it? The second frame doesn't have the right graphics. You can make good-looking cartoony scenes using your 'blender' program for the planets as well, ie. making the land areas come out a bit. Wonderful. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#50. Posted on July 27, 2006 01:04 PM. Your comic strips have some cool graphics, and hopefully I can find that program someday and use it myself. But your artwork is inconsistent. You have only one good slide out of three in both the first and second comic. The other ones can use some better graphics as well, ie. make the text bubbles look 3d comical as well. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#51. Posted on July 27, 2006 01:00 PM. I liked the first image. Hopefully you can make such a graphic for every unit and structure in starcraft,like a battle scene or something similar. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#52. Posted on July 27, 2006 12:57 PM. In the bottom right corner, two of the green lines don't particularly fit: Protected by patents... Mary had a little la... Also, you should have just used the marine thing you get when you choose which race to play in the game, it has better graphics. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#53. Posted on July 27, 2006 12:51 PM. Well, have you read this one yet? I hope you don't mean that most of my pieces are the 'stuff we don't want to see' category, that makes me feel like an outsider. Please take a look at my other pieces as well. I'm getting tired of checking back at so many posts without seeing any additional comments. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#54. Posted on July 27, 2006 12:48 PM. Ever since I began capitalizing the title of my series MEDAL of HONOR, I've seem multiple others do the same thing: HALF SANE full BONS CH24 NOOB MOVE ver.01 ULTRAZEALOT SLOTH "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#55. Posted on July 24, 2006 09:52 AM. I like the humor. Good development. I've followed several of your other Rebel Yell pieces, and this is definitely good for building up characters and relationships. Your idea to work on Kerrigan/Raynor will become very effective later on in your story, because there'll be a lot of occasions where the two meet. I wonder, why isn't this one strung up with the others as a series? "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#56. Posted on July 22, 2006 05:52 PM. Geez, just look at that. OK, I didn't think that there would be so many comments so quickly. Anyways, gotta take it step by step. I have a few points to say: Units coming out of a tramsport exit at intervals, meaning you have to wait a second for the next unit to come out. Therefore marines come out slower. Second, marines with the range upgrade have 6 range, not 5; and I chose to calculate the explosive effect for the Goliath because they're weakest against mutalisks. As an analogy, it's qu ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#57. Posted on July 22, 2006 05:44 PM. Well, you can't expect abc to keep looking at his own posts. It would be about time for him to go on to read others' pieces or write more. In reply to Geckat's question: I've been volunteering at four different places for much of the summer. I've got over 300 hours now I think. Oh by the way, for those of you who have been here a long time, is it usually less activity during the school year than during the summer? "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Dari ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#58. Posted on July 22, 2006 05:35 PM. Wow Geckat, that's pretty harsh. Anyway, back to the poll: Lately I've been back to playing Terran (after doing Terran, then Zerg, then Protoss, and then over and over again in cycles). Yes, Zerglings are great against Terran in the early-early game rush, but as soon as a bunker or two are up, they become practically useless. Even with increased speed and rate, these 'cracklings' still don't amount to much. By the time Terran has either the land mines or the siege mode researched, Zergling ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#59. Posted on July 19, 2006 03:42 PM. You create food from nowhere for the thinkers of the world with "food for thought". "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#60. Posted on July 19, 2006 03:25 PM. The Zerg were once again spreading their tentacles across the planet. This time it was Tanoth, and the Protoss were not far behind on their tails. Under the new Protoss Executor of the Fleet, the golden and violet ships of the Firstborn encircled the planet, and sky-blasted it. The sky was soon smothered, the earth regurgitated lava, and, as it had happened on Chau Sara, Mar Sara, and Antiga Prime, once again, All Life Upon The Planet Surface Was Destroyed. "I learned; I discerned; ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#61. Posted on July 19, 2006 03:16 PM. You'll see... "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#62. Posted on July 19, 2006 03:15 PM. Good idea, maybe if I have the time I'll work your suggestions into my strat. Thanks! "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#63. Posted on July 19, 2006 03:12 PM. I like it a lot, though frankly I don't use nydus canals because I would rather go for Zerg air (which is also pretty fast, and is unvulnerable to the main enemy units: siege tanks and reavers). And I don't know why YD thinks this is 'not really a strat'. It's a protocol on the use of Nydus canals, and you can't have strats without protocols. So good job, hehe! ...Click here to view this comment. |
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#64. Posted on July 19, 2006 03:06 PM. Good analysis of the Ultralisk stats!!! "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#65. Posted on July 19, 2006 03:01 PM. Thanks, Geckat and DocOc. I probably won't be sending in any more then until after this debate finishes its course, and I'll probably see if I can work in revisions into my pieces first. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#66. Posted on July 14, 2006 06:57 PM. I really DO have the "full" writing style??? ! Yikes. I wrote this when I was in seventh grade. And I'm going on twelth grade now. You can see why this piece is rather poor writing. But oh well, I thought since most of the sc.org-goers like to have description, 'slow-paced' action with plenty of detail, and the likes of Terran and Protoss, I decided that this piece could fit in. Note that, once again, I haven't mentioned Protoss; I probably won't, but I plucked the Protoss bui ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#67. Posted on July 14, 2006 04:26 PM. I did say it was good? Sorry if that offended anyone. You can be just as big-headed with your own piece. I mean, come on, authors deserve it, they put too much work into it for them to not have the right to laud themselves. It's open to opinion--If you're American, you know that America is a land of liberty. You can laud and criticize anything you want. So take the liberty, shout profanity at me, whatever... I can live with it. And I guess people vote exp because that's their first impressio ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#68. Posted on July 13, 2006 07:14 PM. Yeah Geckat, funny... The page looks familiar too... "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#69. Posted on July 13, 2006 07:12 PM. Uh, hello, that was the introduction to my piece. Of course it can't be 'expert' immediately. And 2, how does the enemy's inability to have bc before you have expanded supposed to discredit my strategy? You haven't countered it in any important way, so my strategy still stands. Wait a minute... I see a problem with part of my strategy involving the enemy using bc. I'll fix it soon... My bad, I apologize... "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#70. Posted on July 11, 2006 06:36 PM. Lol Haladras, you spelled Jworf's "herowin" wrongly too you know. I think he wants a chic girlfriend. It's obviously heroine. ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#71. Posted on July 07, 2006 03:30 PM. Exactly, about comment 3. That's my logo, and I don't know why it's in the 3D section, because I thought I submitted it under 2d or digital or something like that... I like this picture, and it's really similar to mine ('StarCraft 2'). It's simplistic, but in a good way. It gets the point across, and for all the people here who want to see pretty logos of SC, they should find out just what's so complicated about the logo made by Blizzard for their game of SC. Ya, and I've seen that logo somew ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#72. Posted on July 07, 2006 03:18 PM. Uh... 'discussing what should be done with 6.~7'... Where? I want in! "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#73. Posted on July 07, 2006 03:13 PM. Na'a, let's not force Geckat around, Jworf. A warp materialized out in high orbit around the world of Tanoth (Gu'Tanoth?) and a huge Medal of Honor spun out from the warp hole, followed by a minor Protoss fleet under the command of the Protoss Judicator who took over after abc died back in PFR6. None nearby could tell exactly how many Protoss units were there, except that four solitary Arbiters drifted slowly toward the planet surface. Upon scanner sweep, a Terran crew realized that the huge ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#74. Posted on July 07, 2006 03:01 PM. ---Ok, I'll just be doing a quick review of the first half page. This is just a compilation of the first six parts. After this, I’ll get started right away on the next one in the series. Anyone who has never read the entire series, this is your opportunity to hop on the train. ALL ABOARD!!!!!!! ---Your idea is a good one. I need to be doing compilations as well, though I would say that my own series is too young for that. I've seen Blades of Aiur on the Fiction listings pretty often, and fra ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#75. Posted on July 07, 2006 02:49 PM. Thanks Geckat for handling my review positively so far. It makes me feel like I actually matter in the community. And of course, I'm proud to be of service to you. If you ever need some help with writing or ideas or whatever (though that's unlikely), you can always PM me or something. With Duty and Service. NOT Ktan. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#76. Posted on July 05, 2006 03:16 PM. You have a "Show" where "Soul" ought to be. I hope you realize that this is not really a show, and putting yourself as the speaker really doesn't work very well with us. Some of this stuff is funny, but you have got to be careful--everything there could offend many people. I laughed, but after a while my jaw muscles got tired, so I quit laughing. Or maybe it was because your two-line things are very repetitive. You have got to try something special--like making fun of ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#77. Posted on July 05, 2006 02:59 PM. Great job. I don't know if anyone will read this, but anyways... Good piece, seems almost like an essay. Lot of feeling worked into it, I can tell. The World War Won theme works really well here. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#78. Posted on July 05, 2006 02:47 PM. Okay, to continue with my review: Chapter XX: “What brings you here this rather chaotic evening?” “Your marines.” Exactly. I like Ray's frankness. Bit humorous too, you should try adding more of these. [i]uninformed[/i]. Er, I hope you plan to get these replaced with <I> and <\I>. Or maybe not, at least it caught my attention. "but then he stopped. His eyes widened, and a moment later his chest erupted into a fountain of blood. He collapsed onto the ground." ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#79. Posted on July 05, 2006 01:46 PM. OK, for those of you who are interested in a 'sequel', it's here now, and called 'By Fire and Pen.' Humor-chasers be warned: it's much more serious than this one. Also a bit longer too. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#80. Posted on July 05, 2006 12:01 PM. OK, smasher25: I, JA, give smasher25 and Sadone the NOT STICKY OVER PFR6 RP AWARD for letting Abc use their characters (account names) in his crazed taking over Aiur chronicle. Oops, forgot my sig: "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#81. Posted on June 20, 2006 11:24 AM. Chapter 6: Alan's trickery is interesting. Also, your use of sound words helps us experience the story. Nice, I can tell this is one of the most brilliant pieces of excape literature on this site. Chapter 7: Raynor is another Deus-ex-Machina. Almost unbelievable, but it IS interesting, and we all need a bit of less action and less suspense for a while. Chapter 8: I was confused at this point- who is the cerebrate and who isn't, and who is the shadow? If you add some description a ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#82. Posted on June 20, 2006 10:06 AM. Okay, I've been busy working on my MEDAL of HONOR series. So here's the comments for Chapter 1: Strong use of thought. It makes us wonder the same questions as Alan does. The first chapter shrouds things in mystery, posing at least two main questions that readers expect to be answered later on in the story. It does a good job of revealing the personality of the main character, as well as the general anxiety of everyone else and the discrepancies between the Ghost training and the 'reality' po ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#83. Posted on June 20, 2006 09:48 AM. Like I said, abc, I'm your brainchild. Anything copyrighted to you is also copyrighted to me by right of descent. And no, you said you submitted the poem to Scholastic Art and Writing. And no, they don't copyright your work. By the way, over half of this piece is now my work, not abc's, because I'm constantly making revisions. With that in mind, you can go ahead and vote or comment on mine. I'd appreciate more positive feedback than #4. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrough ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#84. Posted on June 20, 2006 09:38 AM. I know you did. Didn't you give me permission as well? PS> Time to poke you, silly. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#85. Posted on June 20, 2006 08:04 AM. --- And so the great war ended, with a most unlikely ending. PS: No One Post Any More On This PFR. --- === "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#86. Posted on June 20, 2006 07:53 AM. Don't, DocOc. Eiter you'd win, in which case we will all hate you, or you will lose, in which case you will hate yourself for posting your comment #4 right here. Well why don't you all contribute to PFR6. I'm only doing a minor role there, and most of the story is still untouched. Try this on Shakuras? Whatever. --- I mean, why not just try this thing out? And no, I'll be careful to incorporate something from everybody into the piece. I'm not going to choose which ones to put in like ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#87. Posted on June 20, 2006 07:38 AM. Yep, that's what I mean, edit your stuff but keep it under the same great title as before, and come here to tell others. Hmm Tom, I hope you're referring to Don'tShoot, and not me. Yeah DontShoot, why don't you try that. Just call it "Andarin's Ingenious Plan on How to ANnoy the SC.org Staff into Getting DontShoot as Another Admin" will ya? Well, this forum is supposed to go a bit slower than the others. Again, I'm shamelessly self-promoting my MEDAL of HONOR piece here. &q ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#88. Posted on June 20, 2006 07:34 AM. K, I'm dreadfully unfamiliar with Warboards. Oh and by the way, I GOT COMMENT #1 TWICE FOR TWO FANFIC PIECES!! Yahoo! Oh and thanks for saying you like my signature. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#89. Posted on June 20, 2006 07:30 AM. Oh look abc's being hypocritical. Why don't you take back your FIRST MURDERER AWARD also, it's also poorly grounded. And now, for a series of awards I wanted to give: I'd like to take this opportunity to give SilverSlayer the NEWB SUPPORTER AWARD, for being so encouraging with respect to my MEDAL of HONOR series, and for being the first person to read through all four chapters. If only everyone was so helpful, things would go so much better at starcraft.org. I'd like to give Tom the WRI ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#90. Posted on June 20, 2006 07:13 AM. Thanks SS! Though I'll try to bend it toward SC later on, it's not going to have any *magic*, just sci-fi with some weird weirds. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#91. Posted on June 20, 2006 07:10 AM. Yep Tom, I realized that about the signature. It's annoying, especially since it's so long. That's why I copy and paste. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#92. Posted on June 20, 2006 07:08 AM. Wow Tom. But I can't find Nulapeiron... Is it in SC.org or published? They got into the army as Privates because they wanted to, for some ulterior reason. For more info, take a look at MEDAL of HONOR chapter 1. The reason so much of it is confusing and there's very little detail and character is because this is only a rough draft. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#93. Posted on June 17, 2006 04:20 PM. "Well, at least the Protoss have abandoned every planet in Koprulu. That's good; now I can set up another Brood on Aiur, and watch as it prospers," said Maficus, musing to herself. --- <Awaken, child, and behold the glory that is your birthright. For you are a child of the Swarm...> Maficus told her adolescent Overmind back on Earth. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#94. Posted on June 17, 2006 04:15 PM. ------------------------------------------------------- Andarin stood up from his chair. "That's enough help for you, I suppose, Haladras? Listen, I've really got to go. I have a MEDAL of HONOR series to write, a Writing School series to write, and a Forum series to write. I can't spend so much time on PFR6." With that, Andarin and his entire Letters faction warped out from space-time. There was an extremely brilliant flash of light. Maficus got angry. "How c ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#95. Posted on June 17, 2006 04:03 PM. <Not too bad, though,> thought Maficus. <Only 30% of that pie is blue. My Swarms alone cover 53% of the SC-Universe military. Nothing to be afraid of.> Meanwhile, Jormungand continued its winning war against Haladras's demons, who were of course losing because they didn't reproduce as fast as the Zerg. "You've got to come up with a winning strategy for me, Andarin," said Haladras. "Help fight the Zerg. Lure them away. Anything. But I can't stand letting the Zerg ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#96. Posted on June 17, 2006 03:34 PM. Maficus shrugged as she watched Andarin's broadcast meeting on Aiur. "What a puny force this Letters has become," she thought. "I could so easily dominate it with just a single brood." She chose the Tiamat Brood, because it was the second-largest, after Jormungand, which was busy fighting on Earth. The Tiamat went through a warp rift and ended up in high orbit over the planet Aiur. Maficus looked at the planet surface again. "Haha! THey have even less power than I th ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#97. Posted on June 17, 2006 03:26 PM. As SilverScreen led the negotiations on Earth, Andarin lead another set of negotiations on Aiur, with the leaders of other Protoss groups. The Protoss assembled. <We are now ready for the negotiations, Andarin,> thought one of the High Templar. <But where is he?> asked another. True, Andarin wasn't even on the planet. He was on the for-some-reason reconstructed Shakuras, and had entered the Xel-Naga temple on that planet before the Zerg, busy fighting on Earth, knew what was ha ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#98. Posted on June 17, 2006 03:11 PM. Of course the second one! Wait, the story is still too confusing, and we need someone to summarize what happened in the last few dozen posts. --- Andarin was spared his life after he promised not to godmod, whatever that means. Then his Protoss buddies quickly put his various blown-apart body parts back together, and then mysteriously the Zerg presence on Aiur had just disappeared. Through the PFR6 posts, Andarin found out that they had just landed in Saskatchewan, where-ever that was. Th ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#99. Posted on June 17, 2006 02:32 PM. Well, since this particular forum is all about self-advertising, I'll start it off (with some blatantly shameless self advertising) :
I've completely replaced the MEDAL of HONOR Prologue:Initiative plot with something totally different. Would like it if you would take a look at it, and tell me what you think. This works especially well if you got tired of reading oh-so-many SC battle fanfics and want something different.
Note that I'm not submitting it separately because I like the title ...Click here to view this comment. |
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#100. Posted on June 17, 2006 02:14 PM. Seems like no one else is posting. So I'll be the first to do so. Exceptional beyond doubt. Maybe if you broke it into pieces, we'll have an easier time reading it all. So this is like chapter 24? And if so, why is it bigger than chapters 1-23 combined? It's a TREMENDOUSLY LONG STORY, so I haven't finished reading it yet. I'll probably have some stuff to say after I finish reading it. But what I want to say, is that you have an impressive record, and an even better ability to juggle site t ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#101. Posted on June 17, 2006 01:59 PM. This is no longer my first piece of work. The original prologue isn't here any more, because I plan to put it somewhere in Chapter 1. Instead, I placed a much longer, but even less SC-relevant prologue in its place: a short story of a grandfather passing a heirloom and a heritage to his grandson. Please give me comments on this one as well, I really need it. I decided to add it to the beginning because it 'is' the initiative that launches the story. Now the prologue title makes a bit more sen ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#102. Posted on June 17, 2006 12:27 PM. 'course I do. I understand everything about your piece (which, by the way, doesn't mean much, 'cuz if I don't I just re-write it in a way so that I DO understand it). So if you don't get it, I'll explain it here. But otherwise, skip this post, cuz I'm trying not to come across as bigheaded.
---
Anyone remember this line?
"He was about to hit when the guard, hand moving only inches to the gun, squeezed the trigger. A rapport.
It was over, everyone thought. Their position had be ...Click here to view this comment. |
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#103. Posted on June 17, 2006 12:11 PM. Okay, I'll be the first to comment. Nice, and even though I didn't read your earlier version, I can see that this was a good job. Well, what kind of person are you? If you like positive comments, go to A. If you like negative comments go to B. A. It's rather humorous at the beginning, with the broken rifle and the impending Zerg attack. Also, your saying that the Ghost needed only one more kill brought some suspense to the piece. Good realism, makes your piece kind of come alive. It's ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#104. Posted on June 17, 2006 11:57 AM. Gaah. The only person who reads all of my submissions is also very angry and fussy. Not a good situation. Please, just judge it on the quality of this story. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#105. Posted on June 17, 2006 11:55 AM. Coolio. Does the all rights reserved thing help me in any way with any changes that I make to abc's pieces, and is what you just said legally acknowledged? 'CUz if it is, I'm going to have to consider making it a novel, and publishing it... Why aren't there any commentary comments? (pardon the redundancy-- you know what I mean.) "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#106. Posted on June 17, 2006 11:51 AM. OK, I'm going to say this for the last time. Abc's dead! "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind PS. What do you think about my signature? PSST. Don't vote on this. ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#107. Posted on June 17, 2006 11:47 AM. PSST. Don't vote on this. Well, I've got to get it started... I, JA, give SCChamp the HUMOROUS REPETITION AWARD, for his Plot Devices, flashes of light, and deja-voodoo back in PFR 6. Anyone with me? "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind "There was a flash of light..." Well, I've got to get it started... I, JA, give SCChamp the HUMOROUS REPETITION AWARD, for his Plot Devices, flashes of light, and deja-voodoo back i ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#108. Posted on June 17, 2006 11:43 AM. Ok Ktan, I looked at your link. There seemed to be two definitions of Deux ex Machina: 1. Something that doesn't fit the story but changes it a lot to make it more interesting and to resolve a difficulty that can't be overcome any other way. 2. Sudden realization that everything in the piece comes together. I would think that the first definition fits... The events caused by the teacher are improbable and don't fit the story, but they do change the plot a lot, maybe (for me it does) makes i ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#109. Posted on June 17, 2006 11:34 AM. Thanks so much for the comments. Like I said, I might move this piece to Chapter 1, and then it won't matter how short this piece is. Though I do agree, it's too short to stand on its own. Oh I see... Abc's revived himself and come to scourge his murderer. You're still too angry from my taking advantage of you. Anyways, I really appreciate your thinking that my piece is good. I'll try to make it better, of course, and I hope that this prologue has got at least a few of you interested into ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#110. Posted on June 16, 2006 05:09 PM. I didn't insult anyone, I hope. I just want to have a proper discussion with all the reviewers so that I can better understand their suggestions and criticisms. Nothing mean. Sorry if I gave it to you the wrong way. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#111. Posted on June 15, 2006 05:04 PM. STAR WARS???? This isn't even close to the Star Wars logo. I wonder what coolie StarCraft logos you've been seeing... And the rest of the first paragraph, CrabTasterMan, you've got to explain better. Or someone tell me what's the point of that statement. By the way, you want it cartoony? Take a look at the Comic Strip section. And how can I do popcorn effects anyways... Whoa what's this? ?Que significa la frase "güzel olmuş güzel... 
bide indirebilsem.."?
"I learned; ...Click here to view this comment. |
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#112. Posted on June 15, 2006 05:01 PM. Haha you and your Spanish... And by the way, since I don't have any dictionary that defines the two terms, what exactly is the difference? If it's appreciable, maybe I'll move this text to another title and replace this piece with some other story that matches the correct meaning of the term Anyways... Suggestions always valued. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#113. Posted on June 14, 2006 06:00 PM. Excuse me, but... If you've kept up with the comments, you'll see that while abc and the Letters faction arrived on Aiur, took the Twin Crystals, and obliterated the Zerg (as the Protoss did in Episode 4 of Broodwar), no one did anything to oppose all that. And when I set up my base exactly at abc's base (since I'm the new leader of Letters), STILL no one opposed me. Why all of a sudden lashing out at me? I'm NOT GODMODDING!!! I just continued the logical flow of the a ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#114. Posted on June 14, 2006 05:52 PM. I'll be the first to comment on it. First off, WAY better than the last one. You make it interesting, and at times I go, yeah, that makes sense now! And I get delighted by that feeling. It's also coming closer to the Starcraft unit properties, so to us SC mongers its more believeable. Still, you ought to get some proofreading. That will make it even better. I think you've got potential. You may think you're a noobie, but that's irrelevant. I'll be looking forward to more (though this ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#115. Posted on June 14, 2006 03:56 PM. Geesh Delta, you really DO like criticizing. Of course what you said about the SC logo is correct- but if I did the same thing, then it wouldn't be my own work. And by the way, sharp, clean, shiny... that's my piece, aint it?
Don't know if I'm contradicting my self.
Well, thanks for all these comments, it's my first fanart submission and the way you take it soo seriously is very cool. Course, you can't expect too much from my first submit.
OH by the way, since this is the only pic ...Click here to view this comment. |
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#116. Posted on June 14, 2006 03:44 PM. I totally agree with DA. Oh by the way, I think Abc's like *dead* (take a look at the PFR 6 to see what I'm talking about). So if you're interested in the story, please take a look at the MEDAL of HONOR series, which is basically my continuation of this story. It's my first series, so I would be glad to have some input. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind Oh yeah and the thing about that piece being too detached, I'm going to fix t ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#117. Posted on June 14, 2006 03:39 PM. Thanks for your input. I'll admit right away, it WAS rushed, and if you check you'll see that I posted seven works in one day. But the Writing School series is supposed to be mildly humorous and satirical (whatever that means) because I don't want to get flamed (obviously). So I'm trying to pull this off without coming across too big-headed. I'll have to change it a bit though. Plot device? I thought that and DEM is about the same thing. Well, I just hope you find it interesting. At least it ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#118. Posted on June 14, 2006 03:33 PM. I wasn't actually sure that this was good enough a piece to exist, even though the latter ones prop it up. I'm currently coming up with a different prologue, and when that happens this current one will likely get displaced to the first portion of Chapter 1. That means this entire prologue might become something else... I hope no one would have any problems about that. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#119. Posted on June 13, 2006 10:52 AM. Actually, the stats are like this: TvT, ZvZ, PvP: 50%-50% TvZ, TvP: 50%-50% ZvP: 50.5%-49.5% Extremely balanced, though Zergv Protoss is a bit up because of the race's inherent flexibility (Hatcheries instead of Starports, Gateways, and Robotics Facilities all together, etc). "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#120. Posted on June 13, 2006 10:40 AM. Wow the very first comic strip. Why would non-red Marines be expendable? Is an Enrico811-colored Marine expendable? "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#121. Posted on June 13, 2006 10:36 AM. Lol. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#122. Posted on June 13, 2006 10:34 AM. Hilarious. Keep up the good work. Why the 'Episode 1' part? "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#123. Posted on June 13, 2006 10:32 AM. HMMMMMMMM. Make these into a series. I hate going back and forth between your pages and the list. Good stuff here. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#124. Posted on June 13, 2006 10:30 AM. To Comment 12: Umm. You get another guy to shoot 'em, then get rid of the guy. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#125. Posted on June 13, 2006 10:24 AM. Hilarious. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#126. Posted on June 13, 2006 10:22 AM. It was both funny and made sense. Keep up the good work. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#127. Posted on June 13, 2006 10:21 AM. This is so funny. I like the way you balanced it. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#128. Posted on June 13, 2006 09:46 AM. Wowie! Very well made. Keep up the good work; I hope to see a lot more from you. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#129. Posted on June 13, 2006 08:14 AM. So many bad comments... But I think it's good. I like the golden part, it makes it seem utopianly shiny... Exceptional. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#130. Posted on June 13, 2006 08:07 AM. DUDE, this is meant to be a LOGO. I mean look at the StarCraft and BroodWar logos-they're even more simple than this one. This FanArt section is meant for any kind of 2d Art. I would appreciate it if you would all judge it for what it is in its genre, rather than judge it compared to something come out of a Raytracing or Scanline 3D graphic art program. Thanks. And since it's a logo, it's going on the MEDAL of HONOR Series front page. Oh by the way, if you have time, please read it and giv ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#131. Posted on June 13, 2006 07:31 AM. WHAT !!! THIS IS NOT A THREE DIMENSIONAL MODEL! THIS IS A 2D IMAGE! I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO TELL YOU THAT!!! ...But isn't anyone going to vote on it? This is my first artwork, and I need some feedback! P L E A S E ! ! ! "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#132. Posted on June 13, 2006 07:29 AM. This is my first piece of work, so please vote on it and give me some feedback! P L E A S E ! ! ! "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#133. Posted on June 13, 2006 07:13 AM. Anyone who's been following the story carefully, tell us what's going on. We need a list of characters, whose side they're on, where they are, and what their situation is. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ERMMM. Comment 344 has a plot conflict with 343 and 335. Let's resolve it: Since BrotherGreen, Tom, Snot, and theDutchGelle had just crash-landed on Aiur, and Maficus had NOT, he couldn't have saved the Zerg leader. The four h ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#134. Posted on June 13, 2006 07:07 AM. NOW BACK TO THE PFR STORYLINE:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Just then, Snot, Tom, Dutch, and BrotherGreen (see comment 335) crash-landed into an open field in Abc's base, now the major Protoss base in the sector. Before they could right themselves, they were surrounded by an assemblage of Protoss warriors. <explain yourselves.> "Well, we fled from the bad guys on Shakuras," began Snot. "I don't like you. I had a bad experience with you back at SC.org. So close your m ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#135. Posted on June 13, 2006 06:34 AM. Now the new leader of the Letters faction, and much more careful than the last, Andarin surveyed the damage that had been done to the Protoss families who had lost their sons in the battle for Aiur. The mass funeral had finally been accomplished, and now he was given the sole responsibility of deciding what to do. Suddenly, an idea hit him. "We will build our base at the Protoss Temple here on Aiur. That way, no alien will ever set foot upon the planet." He looked upwards, toward ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#136. Posted on June 13, 2006 06:19 AM. Gives a good laugh. Keep up the good work. I'll see if you can do more of these humorous pieces. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#137. Posted on June 13, 2006 06:17 AM. It doesn't need a full-fledged war to have a relation to SC. I like the piece because it allows us to feel the characters. It may be slow, but it's detailed, and that's all we ask from this genre. Keep it up, DocOc. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#138. Posted on June 13, 2006 06:10 AM. Delta: We all appreciate your comments, but there's no point repeating what you say and criticizing what everyone else says about your comments. Do more positive criticism, because people are more receptive to that than to negative ones. If you plan to comment, do so in a way that will get others willing to listen. Haladras: Now's not the time to get personal with Delta. You'll be much happier if you just ignore him and watch as everyone else ignores him as well. Everyone else: The thing a ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#139. Posted on June 13, 2006 05:53 AM. Strong development for Wrothgar. Though it sounds like a college essay with the topic of 'write about an experience that taught you something', you did a nice job that allowed me to sense what was going on. Have you thought about developing fear, courage, and pride some more? Like, what can the characters do that will show these traits? "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#140. Posted on June 13, 2006 05:39 AM. Since I'm an artist, I can say that the easiest way to ruin a piece is to do it on notebook paper in just 10 minutes. Try drawing on a good piece of paper, landscape-wise, and spend more time. Interesting design can be emphasized and detailed a bit more. Keep drawing--the more you draw, the more you will have for a taste in this category. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#141. Posted on June 13, 2006 05:36 AM. The part about the Scantid might have some relevance in Part 2, or otherwise it shouldn't be here. The spelling needs a lot of work; one idea is to plug it in Word.exe and see what happens. Remember that for beginning writers, proofreading can give a big boost. Keep writing! "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#142. Posted on June 13, 2006 05:26 AM. Sounds like it should be in the humor section. Part of the reason is the frequent poor spelling, but that's OK- you'll get better. For now, just be happy that you're getting more reviews than I'm getting. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#143. Posted on June 13, 2006 05:20 AM. Um... What do you mean? (both of you) "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#144. Posted on June 12, 2006 01:06 PM. WOWIE. 'Nuff said. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#145. Posted on June 12, 2006 01:03 PM. This is the best suspense I've ever read in this site. Hopefully the rest of your story will build off of that and be just as powerful and convincing. *You Mad Scientist* "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#146. Posted on June 12, 2006 12:51 PM. Exceptional. Realistic personalities and okay dialogue, combined with your determination to KEEP WRITING MORE!!! Well... That's all I have to say. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#147. Posted on June 12, 2006 12:33 PM. Good description of the battle. Though if you will take my suggestion, try adding other stuff as well. Like... humor. It's soooooo serious and the fighting portion is everywhere on this site. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#148. Posted on June 12, 2006 12:23 PM. I liked the piece. Let's see: 1. Humorous stuff scattered at the beginning and the end- drew me in 2. Extensive dialogue. Makes war seem kinda nice. 3. Nice suspension. Makes me want to reed on. 4. You didn't go overboard with elaborate battle descriptions. That's good. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#149. Posted on June 12, 2006 12:08 PM. Hmm... You could try making it sound more realistic. Interesting storyline, but one way to ruin your piece is to go counter with 'canon' events such as ressurecting Chau Sara after Duran gets killed or ressurecting Tassadar after the Overmind gets killed. Many of us have read a lot of pieces, and you'll develop a touch for what's believable and what isn't if you read others. For example, 'Senior of the Swarm', 'Rebel Yell' series, and 'Medal of Honor' are all good pieces that can get you quickly ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#150. Posted on June 12, 2006 11:58 AM. I've done a LOT of work on that Medal of Honor thing already, since I definitely have abc's approval. It's got a prologue and 4 chapters and work on a 5th chapter that spans 47 pages on 5" by 8" margins. This one has a bit more description in it. I've submitted it already, and hopefully it gets accepted. It's going to turn into a series, I think. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#151. Posted on June 12, 2006 08:35 AM. I liked the last line. Exceptional. I read from some Blizzard novel that Desperate Alliance was a defense of the core Mar Sara city, and that there were a LOT of dropships coming to rescue the civilians. If you added that somewhere in your story, it will become much stronger. And what does Sines and Dones mean? Please give me a reply via private mail. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#152. Posted on June 12, 2006 08:17 AM. Unlike most pieces, this one is in present tense, which makes it seem a bit more realistic. Overall, the plot was interesting, and the description was immersing. I liked it enough to read the entire thing, and I probably will want to read the sequel. I liked the ideas. Exceptional. ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#153. Posted on June 12, 2006 07:27 AM. I like your use of description for maximum effect. Your spacing of battle scenes makes them "count" more than I had expected. Exceptional. ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#154. Posted on June 12, 2006 06:23 AM. I agree with all the negative critics out there. If Abc really wants to write something like this, he should do it in an interesting way... like through the Humor section. In fact, that's what I'm planning to do... A Writing School series that pokes fun at writing in general. Let's see what abcxyzzzz is going to do as far as revising this piece. He's not a good sport, is he, alienating over half of the replies. Oh wait... he can't, because he's dead. I killed him in PFR 6. "I learn ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#155. Posted on June 12, 2006 06:18 AM. Hmm. That pic can be worked on a bit. Also, stop gloating about how cool your story is. It's too confusing, and when that occurs, we can't understand it no matter what it means to you. Since I'm your brainchild, I'll take your story from here. Just let me know in a private letter or something. "I learned; I discerned; I thought; I wrought." -------An Darin, Might of the Mind ... Click here to view this comment. |
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#156. Posted on June 12, 2006 06:14 AM. OK, enough of this Abc stuff. I mean, good work, but it's not really part of this PFR. So to quickly wrap up that chronicle, here's the most sensible ending I could think of... Abcxyzzzz watched from low orbit in his Carrier as powerful winds tore across the surface of Aiur, obliterating all in its path. It would be cleansed of the Zerg at last. Behind him, the funeral processions had begun. The Protoss were a closely knit group, and many had lost their brethren to the assault on the Templ ... Click here to view this comment. |
